Your Prenup: How Your Family Law Attorney Betrayed You

If you have a prenuptial agreement, chances are that the family law attorney who represented you betrayed you and didn’t even realize it.   I often tell clients to get a prenup if they are getting married later in life, and insist my older clients pay for their child’s prenup. And soon thereafter, much to my dismay, I see yet another prenup that unintentionally-yet-completely screws my client if his or her spouse dies unexpectedly.   Prenups serve one vital purpose: “Split Money.” There is usually a financial disparity between the parties when the couple marries, so the wealthier spouse naturally wants to protect his or her money from the other spouse’s financial grasp after a short marriage. So the prenup

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College Kids in Trouble! Draft Your Child’s Health Care Proxy

Ah, the Ivory Tower, where high school kids aspire to escape to, and parents best hope for 4 years of peace and quiet. But with independence comes responsibility: Travel, driving, concerts, and protests. And drinking. Lots of drinking. And then comes a horrible injury or hospital admittance, followed by a parental realization: You are not allowed access to your adult child’s health care information, and cannot make decisions regarding their health care.   In most states, the age of majority is 18, and once he or she moves out of his or her parent’s residence they are considered an adult with all of the privacy rights that inure to adults.   The only individual who, by default, has access to

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Second Wives: Reapers of Sorrow, Destroyers of Family Wealth!

In a world where our assets are constantly under threat from usurious taxes, government largess, financial predators and rapacious offspring, there is still NO worse threat to intergenerational family wealth than a second wife.   People get married the first time for any one of a number of reasons: Family pressure, filling a void, the urge to have children, an inexplicable desire to emulate the lives of Al and Peg Bundy and passion.  But these first marriages often end, sometimes with children left in their wake, and are replaced by a second marriage based on love, devotion and emotional security.   In these second (or third) marriages, often one spouse tends to be significantly older and more financially secure than

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The Top 5 Things to Do When a Family Member is Terminally Ill

Watching a person’s last days of life is often a horrible, gut-wrenching process. The dying individual may or may not be able to communicate, and the trauma of seeing a loved one approaching their end makes it difficult for spectators to make decisive decisions. But no matter what the case, if you want to do what is best for your family, you must utilize the precious remaining days of your loved one’s life to take action on certain items, as these matters get much more difficult and stressful upon his or her passing. Figure Out Funeral Arrangements: May people have funeral plots or pre-paid burial arrangements, but these details are often not formally shared with family and friends beforehand. If the

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Increase Executor Commissions by Including Real Estate Transfers

You have a good deal of latitude structuring Executor’s commissions in a Will. There are many subtleties to default Executor commissions that apply if you don’t substitute them; in order to be fair to your Executor, one that you may want to modify relates to instructing your Executor to transfer real estate under the terms of your will.   In New York, Executor commissions are based on collecting and distributing property, primarily intangible investments. These commissions are easy to calculate, since investment assets are easy to price, transfer and sell. But the family home – typically the largest Probate asset – is not so easy to administer, and is not always commissionable.   If the real estate is sold as

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Medicaid Pitfalls: Cash Value Life Insurance

Qualifying for Medicaid can be a pain in the neck: You can only qualify for benefits if you have a limited amount of assets and income. Yes, there are some exceptions, but in most cases there are financial limits. Unfortunately, people’s past investment decisions may severely impact their current eligibility.   One of the worst former financial decisions for Medicaid planning is the limits placed on cash value life insurance.   “Permanent” life insurance is meant to last until you reach age 95 or 100, then pay out to you or your beneficiary even if you are still alive. These policies allow you to invest extra money to the policy’s “cash value” so that as the annual cost of the insurance

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Disinheriting Someone? Don’t Use a “Pour-Over” Will

You have a right to leave money to who you want to and, when you have a will, can leave it to those you want: It is not uncommon to disinherit a family member who would otherwise receive an inheritance if no Will existed. However, your nearest family members (some of whom you may have disinherited) are required to receive a copy of the Will when you die. Clearly you do not want these disinherited people giving your choice of beneficiaries a hard time. Many people rightly resort to disinheriting an heir by bequeathing money using a Trust which has no requirement of placing such family members on legal notice. However, there is one regularly-used shortcut that can defeat your

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Leaving the Right Gift to the Right Person

I meet several clients who, upon death, want to automatically give their daughters their jewelry and split their remaining property equally between their children. This is also the default position suggested by general practitioner attorneys who will draft a two page Will for their lifetime client, and avoid the consultation time needed to truly understand their client’s desires. My experience suggests that serious consideration must be given to distributing the correct amount of property, and the right type of property,  to each beneficiary. Most people leave property first to their spouse, then to their children equally – they have equated equally loving their children with bequeathing them equal amounts of property. It goes without saying that even in “healthy” families this may not be

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How to Choose an Estate Planning Attorney

You may have some idea of how an Estate Planning Attorney can help you (Wills, Powers of Attorney, Health Care Proxies, Trusts), but may not know how to choose one. In addition to the questions you would ask any service professional, here are some thoughts and questions you may want to consider prior to signing a Retainer Agreement with the attorney, who will help you establish your estate plan: EXPERTISE: Does the attorney primarily practice New York estate planning, or are they a general practitioner licensed in multiple states? If your estate planning needs are relatively simple (minimal assets, you are married in a first marriage without kids, no disabled relatives) a general practitioner may suffice. However, I have also seen some horrible Wills drafted by

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Simple Dos and Don’ts of Gifting for College Education

Higher education is usuriously expensive. The fact that a child’s education may cost as much as you paid for your first house should highlight the importance of gifting these funds in the correct way.   You can pay an unlimited amount of money for a child’s education expenses, provided you pay the money directly to the educational institution. Qualified education expenses are looked at as a benefit to public policy, and therefore do not require the donor to fill in a gift tax return. The funds are also not deducted from your lifetime gift tax exemption, meaning you can continue to gift additional funds without having to assess a tax.   Paying a child back for their student loan payments

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